On one hand, I can see where the OP felt the need to be "in sync" with what his wife and the other Mr. are doing, but still . . .
Not only do I wonder why he went ahead with something he didn't really want to do, but why he doesn't do this with his wife?
When it comes to oral attention, I'm spoiled rotten. As keeping pace with my honey and his partner . . . I gave up on that awhile ago.
=)