[CXXC]

Welcome to the board!

My minor in college was speech and communications. I did not study how to give speeches. What I studied was HOW people talk, the WAYS and WHAT they say. One of the most interesting classes I remember was titled “Gender Speak”. This course offered a different view on the communications between men and women.

Point and case, I site a couple driving down the road for a visit to friends or relatives. It is a bit of a drive and the man is hell bent on getting there. We have all seen this happen in our own lives several times.

As they travel toward their destination the woman (Not driving) looks to the man and asks, “Are you thirsty?”

The man, still determined to put as many miles behind him as he can to reach his destination as quickly as possible, replies, “No.”

As the convenience store quickly comes into and then out of view, the woman becomes sullen. She soon exhibits frustration toward anything and everything.

What really happened here?

The woman was thirsty but didn’t want to “Force” the man to pull over and take the time to get her a beverage. In stead, she tried to put her desires into his thoughts by suggesting through her question that he was, in fact, thirsty. The fact that he did not understand the true meaning of her question, more over the intent, upset her. He was not in tune with her needs and did not need a drink. She became frustrated with him.

The conversation the OP has related smacks of this situation. She clearly brought the topic up without prompting from him. She had been thinking about it, checking the e-mails, and from my understanding of the information gathered, liked the people she met enough to remember the personalities.

She gave him permission to become involved in the site activities and e-mail correspondence once again. She said nothing negative about swinging or her past history with it. In fact, I believe that in her statement:

"I am glad we went to City A for vacation, because City B had a Swinger Party there this last night." "I noticed that there was a Party in City B from the subject line of a email I received from the Swinger Website we are on."

Was her way of trying to engage the OP into a discussion of attending another party in the near future. Her statement of being glad they went to City A is evidence of her desire to attend parties again. One does not go to a different city to avoid a party in another one. Cities are big enough to avoid them already!

She simply opened the doorway of conversation, nonverbally giving him permission to investigate the Lifestyle again. She also attempted to, through gender speak, put it in his lap thereby making it look like it was his idea. Had the OP continued with the conversation further, he would have eventually found that through her asking open ended questions, he would have taken over the entire conversation pertaining to the lifestyle.

Do I think she is interested in the lifestyle? Yeah, I think so!