[thor-in-vegas]

thanks again for the replies.

JAJ-

you are exactly right.
my wife is beautiful, and im not the only one who thinks so. she gets flirted with as much if not more than i do. she is not happy with her weight, and that is affecting her self esteem these days.
she is used to being the sexy vixen that could have any man she wanted, and i dont think she feels that way these days. she is wrong, but its what she thinks that matters here.

its kinda funny the way marriage changes the way you define yourself.
before we got together we were both fiercely independent and both loved the attention we got being single.

now we both have to rely on the other partner for all that attention.

when you said there might be something that i am doing that is lowering her self esteem, i realized that i need to spend some time thinking about that and making sure that i am not inadvertently hurting her. thank you.

i posted this because i was wondering if this might be a reason my wife gets jealous when she thinks i am ogling some other woman, and i needed some female perspective on it.

because of all you smart and helpful folks, i have learned something very important that i feel like i should have known all along.

that its not just about how many compliments i give her when we are at home, but how much i need to be completely into her when we are out on the town or whatever.

i think many of us guys know that we need to make our woman feel like the most beautiful woman in the room, but maybe we dont realize just how many ways there are of doing that, and by not doing it, we are actually reinforcing the opposite.

i feel like i have gotten the exact perspective i needed and am very thankful to those who helped me realize what im doing and not doing.

my wife and i have never "swung", maybe we will someday, maybe we wont.
im not going to put much energy into thinking about that anymore, im just going to concentrate on making sure my wife knows she is the sexiest thing i have ever seen, which she is.

wanna know how much your advice has helped me?

last night we went to a swingers club for the first time, agreeing just to people watch and mingle a bit, and we had a great time!!!

the guys were all over my wife, and it was pretty hot watching her politely turn them down. LOL

i was turned on by her and was completely into her the whole time.
because she knew i was all about her, she kept talking the girls we were hanging with into showing me their boobs. LOL

there is no way that would have happened if she wasnt 100% confident in that moment that i found her boobs the sexiest of any ive ever seen.
which they are!!!

i may start another thread on some things we noticed at the club, but thats a different subject.

thanks again everyone, oh, and yes, we had some INCREDIBLY hot sex when we got home, and i have had to have her like every three hours since then! WOW!
later,
thor