[The Fuse]

Yep, what she said.

Most swingers are normal, stable people whose homes are like yours and mine. If you feel comfortable and haven't seen any signs that they are weirdos, then do what comfort and chemistry tell you to do. If the whole idea is too new to you to feel comfortable, then don't do anything.

When we were new, we definitely passed up a couple of opportunities that we would take now. Back then, we just wanted to take things more slowly. I suggest being up-front about your general unease with the people you're meeting. That way, even if you like them but don't go back to their house, they'll know you are into them.

Another possibility is to go to a hotel. Some people are more comfortable with that because then the foursome is not in one couple's "territory" or the other. I've never had any discomfort about being in someone else's territory versus my own, but some people feel this way. Your feelings might be about simply being alone with another couple out of the public eye, because of vague (or not vague) fears about them doing something you wouldn't want them to do, or turning out to be bizarre people in some way. If you decide to go somewhere with them, don't be afraid to talk to your SO and just leave if you start to get the willies or if things start to go downhill.

All that being said, we've been to other peoples' houses and never had the slightest thought that anything strange would happen or that we were being put under any pressure whatsoever.

Good luck! I hope to hear from you again about how it goes!