[iapr]

Originally Posted by rpu3

Personally, having been to clubs myself, I'd opine that you and your girlfriend go check out the club yourselves - go to their orientation, go ask questions. Most clubs require new guests or members to show up before the club gets busy so they can show you around, tell you the rules and answer any questions. Go take care of the newbie questions and concerns on your own with your girlfriend. I suspect that like many of us who were apprehensive prior to our first visits, you will see for yourself soon enough that there isn't too much to be worried about.

Then, if your work friend mentions the club, you could just reply that you'll be there on X night and you and your girlfriend hope to see her. Or something like that. You'll have just that much more to talk about with your co-worker if you and your girlfriend have seen the club on your own.

Basically, I'd stop trying to arrange to do your first visit with your co-worker, take care of you and your girlfriend first, and leave it at just talking with your co-worker. Maybe you'll see her at the club, maybe she'd recommend other clubs, but it doesn't sound like she's very interested in committing to playing guide for you at this time. It just seems like you've put more effort into trying to go to the club with your co-worker than you have in making plans to go with your own girlfriend. The "check the club out before I bring the wife/girlfriend" IS a tired line for fakes and cheating marrieds. If you aren't pulling shenanigans on your girlfriend, and your intentions were actually true, then I suspect you and your girlfriend can go check out the club scene without a solo trip by you in the company of your co-worker.

Does this club have new member orientations or the like, for you and your girlfriend to see the club in a no-pressure environment? Have you, your coworker, and your girlfriend ever gotten together for drinks or something so BOTH of you can ask your co-worker questions about the club?

I agree with this word for word. There is nothing else I can add to this so read it twice and it will count for both rpu3 and me.