I won't vote cuz i'm single. Having been attached most of my adult life though and having met lots of couples with open relationship here is what I think.
Most don't work out. The reason is that most people really don't have enough security in themselves to feel comfortable about it. I have seen quite a few couples go that way and end up splitting up. Now on the other hand some couples do great with it. If I got the gist of your inquiry I believe you are wondering if you think it is a good idea or not.
Absolutely if you are really capable of handling it. In a perfect world I guess we should all be able to handle it but most of us just don't have that much security that it wouldn't be threatening to watch your spouse go off with some good looking sex bomb for the evening. What if she/he wants to do it again tomorrow and then the next day too? There are lots of variables there that I personally could not deal with.
Just swinging is a huge leap above what 99.9% of couples in general can take. Open relationships are a step beyond that concerning total trust and testing insecurities.
I wouldn't recommend it unless both parties absolutely are gung ho for the idea. IF one has to talk the other into it then it is bout doomed to fail i would think. Lots of couples have been convinced by there SO, especially the male to swing, but when you are both together and observing what your partner is doing and picking up on possible emotional attachments at least you have awareness. The step inbetween swinging and open relationships woud be seperate room swinging. Many couples prefer it and many just can't do it.
John. |