[The Fuse]

Jealousy was one of the things we worried about before our first time. I really wasn't sure about how I'd feel about seeing Mr. Fuse with another woman. After all, I had always equated sexual infidelity with betrayal and problems in a relationship. It's hard to go from thinking that way, into the mindset of swinging where it's about sharing sexual variety with your partner, and everyone being happy about it.

We had a full swap and never felt a tinge of jealousy. Like an earlier post said, it is just recreational sex and doesn't mean anything as long as you are certain of your SO's love for you. A romp with someone else, even a really fun one, does not compare to what you have at home. It doesn't mean your emotions will go off in another direction. You might be fond of your playmate, but you won't be bonded with him or her.

However, if only a woman had been there, I'm sure my feelings would have been different. I bet I would have felt like Mr. Fuse was getting to experience this amazing thing and I was not. I probably would have just been jealous of him getting to fuck someone else, not of him being with the other woman, if that makes any sense. Are you considering an FMF because it's what you really want? If so, great. If you're going that direction because you think it's less threatening for your husband, then I suggest you explore those feelings and make sure you're not sacrificing something you want or shortchanging yourself. And like others will point out, unless you already have someone on the hook for an FMF, it can be very difficult to make that happen compared to a swap or MFM.

The key is that in order not to feel jealous, you have to know that your SO's playmate is in no way a threat to the way your SO feels about you, or to your marriage and relationship. Neither of us had even a shadow of a doubt. Looking back on it, I believe that is why we didn't feel a shred of jealousy. It was one of the biggest surprises for us out of the whole experience. I thought there'd be some mixed feelings.

Another thing people who have been there will tell you is that until you get to the situation, you really don't know how you'll react. It might help to visualize things beforehand to try to gauge how you think you'll react, but again, only the real thing will tell for sure. In our case, we got a happy surprise. I hope you do too.