First, Welcome! You have found a great resource and a place where you can feel like people have your best interests in mind. I hope you will read the forums and continue to post.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LilyPuss  As the evening progressed, my husband began playing with my breasts. One of the large men from the table in front came right up to our table, literally drooling; this is what came out of his mouth: "I see you brought the puppies out! Man, puppies are nice." We quickly left the table and went to the VIP section (he did not have a VIP bracelet on).
We were both dumbfounded by that statement. Is this normal? Did we over react to what we considered to be rude as well as an invasion of our space? How is the best way to handle a situation such as this? He continued to stare at us when we returned to the table. We spent the rest of the evening in the VIP room. |
I am sorry this happened to you. I would say it is not something you should expect. He was probably hoping for an invitation to play with your breasts. While people being rude and pushy is certainly not unheard of, it is not the norm. It sounds like you reacted appropriately. There is probably something you or your husband could have said to this guy to let him know he was doing something unwelcome, but I'm not sure exactly what. Maybe something like "We're having fun, but not really interested in participation". If it persists, you could consider letting the club hosts know. They usually want to know if someone is making guests feel uncomfortable, especially new people.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LilyPuss Also, one of the couples we met on-line, we spoke with them via email several times, eventually exchanging phone numbers. We had a few meetings set up; they kept canceling (we understand, life does happen), though we were willing to give them another shot. The husband kept pestering us to change our mind on the same room only thing (they wanted separate rooms, we don't). We kept politely declining, telling him we may change our minds later, but for now, no. I started getting creeped out by him. |
If you are getting creeped out, trust your judgment. And anyone trying to get you to start off in separate rooms, when you have said that is not how you are doing things, is being very pushy! Please be careful. Mr. Fuse and I enjoy separate rooms and same room play. We usually tell new people what we like, but we would never try to separate a wife from her husband. It sounds like that is what they are trying to do. We feel it is important to establish trust in play before venturing into separate rooms. You never know what someone has in mind. If the husband has something different in mind than you do, it is really best if everyone is there. Usually this is not a problem.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LilyPuss They also did not like our choice of clubs we like (fair enough). All of a sudden they wanted to go to the club we enjoy, asking us every few days if we were available on such and such a date. We have explained to them, we don't want to meet people we are interested in in such a sexual environment for the first meeting (meeting folks at a club is a completely different situation). How do you handle people like this? Also, we both suspect that he is not really married, he has a friend for such hook-ups, to more or less get him in the door. Does this happen often? |
Sudden changes can be a sign of trouble, or it could mean that you simply have their attention and focus. But if they seem to be pressuring you to do things a different way than what you have told them you are comfortable with, this is a very bad sign.
If you suspect he is not married, and he has told you they
are married, or implied it, I don't see a problem with checking. Some couples swing who are not married. If they are in a committed relationship, I don't see that as much different, though some on this Board may disagree. Then there are some people who simply "team up". We don't like that because the same emotions are not involved as when the other couple is emotionally committed. Then, there are the "swinging together but married to someone
else" couples. That's a no-go. There is nothing wrong with asking straight out, in a non-confrontational way.
Good luck! We hope you stick around and let us know how things develop.