[ncmd_couple]

Jon,

Everyone is selfish. The key is to acknowledge that we are selfish and understand how that impacts our decisions. People come up with all kinds of excuses for doing what they do, but the bottom line is they did it because they wanted to.

In this case, your wife has gone on this trip because she wanted to. The reality is, even if she wasn't very gentle and understanding in the way she did it, she did do it within the rules that the two of you set. So in reality, she didn't violate your trust. And I think that is an important thing to remember. Yes, she was got to trot and thoughtless, but she did it within the rules at the time. You need to keep that in mind when you doubt your ability to trust her. As long as the rules are open, honest, and something that both of you can live within, you can probably trust her. Something to consider.

S