The Swingers Board - View Single Post

babycole · 01-06-2009, 09:24 PM

To respond to Julie, from what we have learned, their marriage has been rather rocky from the start. When we came into becoming swinging partners with them, we were not aware of this. By the time it became apparent to us (they were great at facades), we had already became friends with this couple. That was the point in time where we stopped any sexual activities with them, and just remained as friends. They seperated for a few months, got back together, and they are seperated again now. So, I'm not so sure that his feelings for me were the reason for the split. Especially since realizing these feelings for what they were, we have limited our contact with each other (which wasn't hard to do as they lived several hours away), and just remained on a friendly level. But who can say what goes on in someone elses mind for sure, right? And yes, before any moves will be made towards anything (if that's what my husband and I agree on), there will be have to be a definite splitting of the two, not just lets seperate and see how things turn out.

As far as Ivory's response, that is exactly how I feel. If my husband found someone who he could happily carry on a relationship with, and he and that other woman were respectful of our marriage and my feelings and were willing to communicate in all ways to make sure that things were going nicely, then I would be absolutely sooooo excited for them! And you are right, having 3 children ourselves, I can definitely say that I was able to love the 2nd & 3rd without sacrificing any of the love I feel for our first! And I feel the same way about the really close friends I have. I truly feel love for them, and the love I have for them does not threaten my marriage. I also have sex with other men through swinging with my husband. That does not threaten my marriage. Maybe this is too much logical thinking on my part, but if that is how that works, why can't I have a friend that I love and that I have sex with that doesn't threaten my marriage as well? That's just basically how I've looked at this...

01-06-2009, 09:24 PM	#11 (permalink)
babycole Here to Stay Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 36 Location: Louisiana Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:babycole	Re: On the cusp... To respond to Julie, from what we have learned, their marriage has been rather rocky from the start. When we came into becoming swinging partners with them, we were not aware of this. By the time it became apparent to us (they were great at facades), we had already became friends with this couple. That was the point in time where we stopped any sexual activities with them, and just remained as friends. They seperated for a few months, got back together, and they are seperated again now. So, I'm not so sure that his feelings for me were the reason for the split. Especially since realizing these feelings for what they were, we have limited our contact with each other (which wasn't hard to do as they lived several hours away), and just remained on a friendly level. But who can say what goes on in someone elses mind for sure, right? And yes, before any moves will be made towards anything (if that's what my husband and I agree on), there will be have to be a definite splitting of the two, not just lets seperate and see how things turn out. As far as Ivory's response, that is exactly how I feel. If my husband found someone who he could happily carry on a relationship with, and he and that other woman were respectful of our marriage and my feelings and were willing to communicate in all ways to make sure that things were going nicely, then I would be absolutely sooooo excited for them! And you are right, having 3 children ourselves, I can definitely say that I was able to love the 2nd & 3rd without sacrificing any of the love I feel for our first! And I feel the same way about the really close friends I have. I truly feel love for them, and the love I have for them does not threaten my marriage. I also have sex with other men through swinging with my husband. That does not threaten my marriage. Maybe this is too much logical thinking on my part, but if that is how that works, why can't I have a friend that I love and that I have sex with that doesn't threaten my marriage as well? That's just basically how I've looked at this...