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I was just curious if you guys had any advice for me on how to help him along in this process. Is there a really great way for me to exlain to him how loving more is a very real thing? Is there a way for me to help ease his worries about it all? I really hate him feeling insecure or jealous in anyway. I hate seeing him fret over this. Especially when I know that through this all, my love for him has not changed, lessened, or dissappeared, even though my love for this other man has grown. So any advice any of you may have that you have experienced that has worked for you would be appreciated!!
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I'm not sure how you expect there to be some magic words or phrases in order to get your husband to accept your feelings and desires. Poly, friends with benefits, whatever isn't any different than swinging! Even the poly people on their message boards sing that same mantra of "go at the slowest person's pace". Yet, I get the feeling from your message that you are looking for other ways to push your husband along instead of moving as slowly as your husband wants or needs you to move. I'd have to wonder if your husband isn't digging in his heels because he feels you might be moving in a direction that doesn't have his best interests at heart.
He's told you his concerns. While I can appreciate talking, talking can be pushing. And there's no magic words to make your husband accept any faster. And there are no guarantees your husband will ever accept this at all.
Talking is fine and necessary, but talking in order to get your husband to accept this is not necessarily what your husband wants or needs.