The Swingers Board - View Single Post - How long to wait after leaving message before making other plans?

The Fuse · 01-03-2009, 10:54 PM

Hi all,

Just a niggling little question of etiquette... there's a couple we met for lunch a few weeks ago. We all hit it off, but didn't play and haven't seen them since. A few days ago they asked us to call them, and we are pretty sure they are interested. Today, I called and left a message asking about doing something next Saturday (preferred) or Friday night. Hopefully we will hear from them soon. We'll call them Couple 1. They seem like good people and a lot of fun.

But then, an hour later, we spoke on the phone to another couple we've been emailing with. They asked us to get together next Saturday night. We'll call them Couple 2. Here's our quandry: we feel like it would be rude to Couple 1 to make plans with Couple 2 before giving Couple 1 a reasonable chance to reply to our voice mail. Now we are trying to figure out how long is "reasonable".

How about you? Would you make plans with Couple 2 right away, since we all know how hard it is to actually make plans with people? Or would you politely say you're waiting for a reply from someone you'd already asked about that night? I feel like we are trying to make a date for the prom or something.

We told Couple 2 we'd call them either way by tomorrow evening. I figure that is enough time to be polite to Couple 1. I am willing to bet they get their messages quickly in general, although they sometimes reply to those messages promptly and sometimes don't.

I just don't like seeming flaky, and am trying to follow the Golden Rule. If it were me in Couple 1's place, I wouldn't feel slighted by the way we have handled it.

Opinions?

01-03-2009, 10:54 PM	#1 (permalink)
The Fuse Way too opinionated Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 1,826 Location: Southeastern Virginia Status: Single Female Swing Lifestyle Name:The_Fuse	How long to wait after leaving message before making other plans? Hi all, Just a niggling little question of etiquette... there's a couple we met for lunch a few weeks ago. We all hit it off, but didn't play and haven't seen them since. A few days ago they asked us to call them, and we are pretty sure they are interested. Today, I called and left a message asking about doing something next Saturday (preferred) or Friday night. Hopefully we will hear from them soon. We'll call them Couple 1. They seem like good people and a lot of fun. But then, an hour later, we spoke on the phone to another couple we've been emailing with. They asked us to get together next Saturday night. We'll call them Couple 2. Here's our quandry: we feel like it would be rude to Couple 1 to make plans with Couple 2 before giving Couple 1 a reasonable chance to reply to our voice mail. Now we are trying to figure out how long is "reasonable". How about you? Would you make plans with Couple 2 right away, since we all know how hard it is to actually make plans with people? Or would you politely say you're waiting for a reply from someone you'd already asked about that night? I feel like we are trying to make a date for the prom or something. We told Couple 2 we'd call them either way by tomorrow evening. I figure that is enough time to be polite to Couple 1. I am willing to bet they get their messages quickly in general, although they sometimes reply to those messages promptly and sometimes don't. I just don't like seeming flaky, and am trying to follow the Golden Rule. If it were me in Couple 1's place, I wouldn't feel slighted by the way we have handled it. Opinions?
	__________________ Through every dead and living thing, Time runs, like a fuse. -- Jackson Browne