[rayna]

Hi everyone. I hope everyone has had a happy holidays - we certainly did!

After your advice and encouragement, I told my hubby and it went great!! I was ready to explode, but I waited until we could get some time alone. Fortunately, my parents invited our two kids (age 6 and 8) to come over after school one day that week to help them decorate their Christmas tree and have dinner. So I told hubby that we needed to have a serious discussion. He came home early and I could see the worry on his face.

We sat at the kitchen table. Thank you all for suggesting I show him my earlier post and the SB site. I was very nervous, but I was able to tell him that this is very hard to bring up, but I wanted to share some feelings with him and then talk about it. Poor hubby, he was as nervous as me, not snowing what I was talking about. Then I slid over the laptop, showed him my post, and said "Please read this, honey."

While he read, I was dying of tension, and excitement. It was the longest minute of my life. When he finished, he looked at me, puzzled, and said "Is this from you?" I nodded. He shook his head and said "Wow! I can't believe it, honey!" He reached out to hold my hand. That moment was magical. We connected at a new level, and I felt an incredible relief and closeness, just like some of you have written about.

Then we talked. He said he knew it turned me on, but he had no idea I would ever want to act on it. I told him he had helped me uncover these secret desires and I wanted so much to share them with him, to act on them with him. We talked about how to move forward. He said we could move as slow as I wanted, that he didn't want to push me faster than I wanted to go, that we had lots of months and years to do this. What a sweet husband! But I said I would burst if I had to wait months and years. I told him about the Swingers Board. I showed him some of the forums I had looked at and we read some of Curious, How to Get Started, etc. He was fascinated and couldn't believe I found all this. We started planning how to move forward, how to decide what kind of men we would both be comfortable with, how to find them, etc. I asked him about the men he said he'd been thinking of, if that was real. He told me about two men at his company who'd told him how hot I was, one them a young guy I'd danced with at their Christmas party, and one an older widower that I'd met a couple of times and chatted with at that party. Mmm, interesting, I said - I remembered both of them, and they were both interesting fantasies.

We talked about visiting a bar to pretend we were picking out men, maybe a strip club, then maybe trying an off-premises club. As we talked, we started touching and ended up making very intense love - instant orgasms for both of us, followed by another for each of us. We talked about it every night when we go to bed. We even have these loving eyes when we are just doing our routine stuff at home and with the kids.

We did go to a strip club to survey the men and talk about what we liked and were comfortable with. We even chatted with one guy for a little while - that got me wet! Then we went to his Christmas party. He hasn't said anything yet to his two candidates, so I really enjoyed flirting with them and with them flirting back without them knowing - even wetter! We both agreed that they could be good playmates.

And for Christmas, my hubby gave me an invitation to a New Year's Eve party at an off-premises club about 50 miles away from our home, just to survey the scene. It was very interesting and exciting. We started just watching. I loved watching women in their slinky outfits or lingerie, meeting and flirting with people, dancing with their partners and new friends, grinding and feeling each other. I just imagined myself being looked over, meeting some guys, dancing with them as they massaged my ass and rubbed against my breasts. Hubby loved pointing out men he thought I'd like (he was right almost every time) and then watching me watching them, panting, my nipples hardening.... A few men came over and chatted with us (without their partners), and two couples came over and we enjoyed talking with both of them - one was new like us, and one was pretty experienced. We declined three invitations to go party right then, but we got four more candidates! We didn't make it to midnight because I couldn't wait that long, I just had to go fuck hubby in the car right there in the parking garage. It was a fabulous night!

We are planning to just go out for drinks and dancing with one of our candidates next. Then we'll see!! We are so excited - the sex and love we have now is incredible. Thank you everyone for helping us reach this beautiful place. I don't think we ever would have gotten here without SB. Happy New Year!

Rayna