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Originally Posted by fun4t&c 
She's a knockout and I just wanna see her play. I don't even care if I do anything. I just really like the idea of watching her role play as a slut for a night, because in reality, she's a good, wholesome woman, even if she LOOKS like a hot porn star.
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She thinks more like Betty Crocker or June Cleaver.
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Maybe your wife thinks that being a swinger means she has to be a "slut" or act like a "porn star." Since you've used this language here I'm guessing you've used those terms with her.
I don't think she is comfortable with those images, nor does she want to become what you describe.
She may also not want to be the "center of attention" as you envision, but would rather consider playing if in a more intimate setting with one other person/couple joining you where you are involved in play with her and the play doesn't place any one person on stage as the main attraction.
You can be a swinger without acting like a slut or porn star. Some women are more at home with swinging when they are being who they are by nature, which in your wife's case is a wholesome lady who is socially graceful, charming and charismatic. Sounds like a classy lady who wants to remain being thought of in this way. You may be pushing her to be something she wouldn't feel right about, i.e., being a slut.
If you, and she, can understand it is possible to be sexually expressive, enjoy sex with others, and be yourself, you'll probably have a better chance of coming to an agreement on giving swinging a try.
By chance, does alcohol play a role in her spontaneity? If so, it really isn't a good indicator of what she is ready to do when she is sober.
to the Swingers Board.
Please continue to join in the discussions and invite your wife to our corner of the world to share her thoughts, too.
LM