[amid]

I agree with some of the other posters that there are quite a few red flags. One big one is that you and your wife allowed a married friend to cheat on his wife. This makes you and your wife cheaters too since you promoted it. This isn't what swinging is supposed to be about. Your wife's introduction into the lifestyle surely got off on the wrong foot. From my own personal experience I would say I could understand her not paying full attention to you, this happened (or seemed to happen to us the first time we had a full swap play). My wife seemed to think I spent too much time with the other woman. She was with the other man.. and I have to admit that it was all new to me and I was into the other woman. But we talked about it a whole lot afterwards and she was good with it after we talked. With this couple I have allowed my wife to play solo with them and the same has been offered to me. But it was with the couple and with everyone's knowledge and permission. From where I sit I see too many things wrong with your scenario. Swinging is about us not about me.. I think you two need to do a whole lot more talking and no more playing with this particular friend. You also need to really discuss what this means to both of you and about the cheating aspect. It's not about cheating, or flying solo it's about sharing.