The Swingers Board - View Single Post - His actions with the female make me uncomfortable...

bbarnsworth · 11-13-2008, 03:22 PM

Huge, major, mega, astonishingly tall, mile high neon letters

*****STOP*****

There's not a single green flag on this one. Your husband
a) broke the rules, kissing her and getting a blow job from her.
b) is developing emotions for her; jealousy of her with others
c) isn't paying attention to your wants and needs
d) is, as others noted, acting like a high school boy
e) is becoming infatuated with her
f) is pressuring you into acceptance

No way. Absolutely not. Done. Over. Kaput. This girl is OUT of the picture.
Your husband should not be swinging until he learns to respect your rules and abide by them without kindness, courtesy and respect. He should be absolutely thankful that you'd be willing to swing and allow him to do so as well, and stop trying to pressure you into accepting something you're not ready for.

If your husband won't stop the association with her, I'd short circuit the situation and call her husband and tell him what's going on. The husband on the other end, if he's sane, will try to pull the plug too.

This situation is a HUGE mistake.

One way for your husband to look at this; if you both go into swinging together, happily experiencing everything together, it's likely he'll have multiple partners over the years you swing. Is he willing to sacrifice all of that future in exchange for one or more rolls in the hay with *one* person, for a very limited time? That's what he's doing. He's approaching this all wrong. You are being harmed, and that is NO way to operate in swinging.

STOP it, NOW. Immediately. It's over. Not swinging, but this relationship with the other woman. Step back from swinging, and spend time talking until you're BOTH ready to move ahead TOGETHER.

11-13-2008, 03:22 PM	#10 (permalink)
bbarnsworth Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 1,870 Location: South Central Indiana Status: Couple	Re: Would like some advice Huge, major, mega, astonishingly tall, mile high neon letters ***STOP*** There's not a single green flag on this one. Your husband a) broke the rules, kissing her and getting a blow job from her. b) is developing emotions for her; jealousy of her with others c) isn't paying attention to your wants and needs d) is, as others noted, acting like a high school boy e) is becoming infatuated with her f) is pressuring you into acceptance No way. Absolutely not. Done. Over. Kaput. This girl is OUT of the picture. Your husband should not be swinging until he learns to respect your rules and abide by them without kindness, courtesy and respect. He should be absolutely thankful that you'd be willing to swing and allow him to do so as well, and stop trying to pressure you into accepting something you're not ready for. If your husband won't stop the association with her, I'd short circuit the situation and call her husband and tell him what's going on. The husband on the other end, if he's sane, will try to pull the plug too. This situation is a HUGE mistake. One way for your husband to look at this; if you both go into swinging together, happily experiencing everything together, it's likely he'll have multiple partners over the years you swing. Is he willing to sacrifice all of that future in exchange for one or more rolls in the hay with one person, for a very limited time? That's what he's doing. He's approaching this all wrong. You are being harmed, and that is NO way to operate in swinging. STOP it, NOW. Immediately. It's over. Not swinging, but this relationship with the other woman. Step back from swinging, and spend time talking until you're BOTH ready to move ahead TOGETHER.