Hi there and Welcome!!!
First off...I can totally understand where you are coming from. I was jealous at first about the prospect of my husband being with another woman, until I did my research and some soul-searching and came to the same conclusion you have - that my husband loves only me and sex is sex (and sex is fun). Just thinking about another woman doing dirty things to my hubby gets me hot. And knowing that he wants me to be pleased and see me pleasing someone else makes it an issue of equality. I think this is the very thing that makes it work or not. Some husbands/wives just can't separate the two. Or, they can't see past their own desires long enough to consider their partner's. In both instances, swinging is a bad choice. But, so is cheating. I certainly am not judging, and obviously you have worked past the circumstances that lead to it. But, my concern would be...if you say no to swinging, can he stay faithful still? Would he be okay with it? Because, in my opinion, swinging isn't the way to stay faithful, it's a way to explore your sexuality as a couple. That being said, I would do just what you are doing: research is a great beginning. As you read around this board and check out dating sites, you'll find that there are a lot of "normal" people just like you out there...and they are looking for YOU! I was surprised, and relieved, to see that! Also, going to a club isn't a bad idea. We did that right away in the beginning just to see what we were getting into and see how we felt "in the thick of it". It was a great way to really understand what it was like and to test our own reactions. Plus, it showed me that those stretch marks and extra inches are more bothersome and noticable to me than they are to others
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Good luck!
Mrs. Oly
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