[ready_to_learn]

I'm the originial poster, I have registered, hopefully I will be able to remember my name on here and whatnot.

We established things like she is to never htink that she is in a relaitonship with him. And he's not trying to force me into a threesome, it was just an option to make me feel better. And I think that I was a lottle harsh in saying I could accept it or getout. I know that's what I said, but it's not exactly true. what he really meant was that this is something I can learn to accept or that maybe we aren't meant to be together. he really wants to be with me and we were together a lot of today and he was treating me better than he has in a really long time. My biggest issue is trusting him, and not because he's ever doen anything in the past that would lose my trust, but that other relationships I've been in were not trustworthy, and not even as far as sexual things goes just no trust in general. Ages don't really matter in thae situation other than I feel she is too young for me to be with. He is a few years younger than I amand she's a few eyars younger than him. And we're relatively young to be getting into this kind of community.

and yes it is just the two of us in the relationship...this other girl is completely third party. I am actually a lot more ok with all of this now than I was before. There are 3 people he has said he trusts for us to talk about htis with in our lives. and I've talked to two of them. both of them have said they don't really understand and one is prepared to beat the ever living crap out of him if he hurts me. so yeah...he has promised to try harder in our relationship. And I do need to give him some space outside of even the sexual exploits that he wants. Jus tin general in life. I dont have a lot of friends outside him. I have a few sadly a lot of them don't live here. So it's hard. My biggest problem is feeling that he is going to abandon me for her. He swears he will never do that. he ahs told me that he has no intention of starting any relationship with anyone else. And that I was allowed to tell a few peopel ifi wanted to go out to local clubs or parties or anything to meet people for myself or for both of us. and I'm kind of open to that. He has some situations and so do I that it's not really approproate for this to get out,a nd I really trust the people who have been told.

But as i said it's not that he doesn't love me or doesn't want to marrying me, and we've even discussed this being a temporary thing, because of extemporary circumstances.

oh and she has also been told that I come first and foremost above everyone else in his life. ie if they were planning to do something and I was in an accident or something just bad happened in my life he woudl come help me and leave her. and I think it is only fair that she know that.

the big problem here is my excess of jealousy and lack of trust and I relaly should be able to trust him. We've been discussing this for 1.5 years and it'snot my fault that he found someone before me and someone that I didn't want to be with. We never said only threesomes. I think before today as a whole there just wasn't enough communication between the two of us. It's not good and we need to work on that some more.

any other details people htink are necessary just ask, I may not give them but you are free to ask.