We got started with going to a local on-premise swing club and just dancing the first time, then later on we went to the on-premise part and just had sex with each other while others were doing the same nearby. Eventually we tried softswap and have been going from there
I'd caution you that you should be totally up front with what you're looking for (just watching) as the term soft-swap has always meant that there is some type of swapping going on (M-F and possibly F-F) but no swapped sex. If you just say you're looking for soft-swap there will be misunderstandings
