 Re: Swinging individually?
It seems that she just isn't willing to see things in a different way. She may say the things you say she has, but she really isn't ready to do anything. She is locked up in the monogamous type of thinking that says you really have one and only one, then if that doesn't work out, you form an attachment with another and go on.
People will continue to look at the sex between a husband and wife as different than many other things in life that are really quite similar. The "eating out" similarity should be mentioned again. No one tells you (in a marriage) the things you can eat. When you eat those things that your SO doesn't like to eat, you are still welcome in the house, even when you like it better than homes' cooking.
The thing that is worrysome is the idea that you may leave bcause of it?
In sex with other people, that is just one face to your relationship with your SO. So many other things make it nice to come home, and part of that is knowing that you CAN eat someone elses food and still be welcome. We should be mature enough to discuss ourselves and our minds with each other?
So, in your situation, you are trying to allow/encourage your wife to be open and tell you her fantasies, to set a foundation. And by doing this, you hope she will allow your fantasy of being with other girls at the risk of her really liking this other guy? I think this is no way to start out. Regardless of your individual desires, you must trust each other beyond all else that Sex really is like eating out. You must convince each other that you can have sex with another and still love your SO more than anything.
When you get to that level of trust, you may be ready to try.
I know, this is simple thoughts, but we really shouldn't make this too complicated...
OTT |