The Swingers Board - View Single Post - What is the most important thing you've learned?

willyoats · 07-05-2008, 02:28 PM

Assuming that your relationship with your primary partner is solid and that you are REALLY ready for swinging, then go in to swinging with:

1) No expectations or preconceived notions about what it will be like or whether you will be successful. Things will turn out as they turn out regardless of what you thought they should be. So, if you don't say to yourself that "things should go this way or that way" then you can't say to yourself afterwards "damn, that isn't what I thought it would be." If you are constantly disappointed, maybe swinging isn't for you!

2) A complete trust of your own gut feelings. When some niggling feeling says "this isn't quite right, but maybe it will work out OK anyway," it probably won't.

By the way, when we started swinging, I violated both 1) and 2) above, much to my later regret.

07-05-2008, 02:28 PM	#15 (permalink)
willyoats Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 216 Location: lady lake, fl	Re: What is the most important thing you've learned? Assuming that your relationship with your primary partner is solid and that you are REALLY ready for swinging, then go in to swinging with: 1) No expectations or preconceived notions about what it will be like or whether you will be successful. Things will turn out as they turn out regardless of what you thought they should be. So, if you don't say to yourself that "things should go this way or that way" then you can't say to yourself afterwards "damn, that isn't what I thought it would be." If you are constantly disappointed, maybe swinging isn't for you! 2) A complete trust of your own gut feelings. When some niggling feeling says "this isn't quite right, but maybe it will work out OK anyway," it probably won't. By the way, when we started swinging, I violated both 1) and 2) above, much to my later regret. Last edited by willyoats : 07-05-2008 at 02:30 PM. Reason: adding last sentence