I'd like to first commend you both on doing the research first... would hate for you to 'buy a lemon' while 'looking for an apple'.
Second...
My wife and I are fairly new to the Lifestyle, but we spent the better part of two years talking about it off and on and reading the forums as well as books.
We have embraced the Lifestyle as a very fun thing to do together. We get to meet and make friends with new and interesting people. We socialize, sometimes go to a Vanilla club to dance, or have dinner with our 'dates'.
We get to have some of the most incredible sex with, well... almost perfect strangers. Although, we like to think they are perfect friends.
I would hold all the advice above in high regard. This Lifestyle is not for everyone. Only the two of you can evaluate whether it for you or not. Go at your own pace. Do the research. Get lots of feedback. TALK to and LISTEN to... generally communicate with your spouse about ALL of your concerns, desires, fantasies and fears.
I hope you both have lots of fun, no matter your choices. *HUGS*