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Originally Posted by geminigrey  So newbie here.. the wife and I have decided that our marriage is 'open', meaning that if we met someone we want to have sex, we have approval to go play. It's still in the theoretical stage at this point, but it's still early on.
I think the difference in what we're looking at and swinging is that even though we're a couple, I don't know that we'll play together. Honestly, I think she's more comfortable with the idea of having one-on-one with someone she's built up a friendship with than being 'exposed' to several people. Self-conscious and all that.
Which actually puts me in a worse boat than if I were a single man. The assumption (and probably with good reason!) is that a married man playing alone is cheating on their spouse, which is worse than some single guy just trying to get laid. Of course, that sounds like I'm being whiny.  I'm not really out and looking for people to go have sex with, I'm just leaving the door open to possibility. |
I can honestly see your worry. As a couple, we are put off by people who claim it's ok for them to play alone, unless I've heard from the other half myself that it's ok. We don't wish to get involved in cheating. Too messy, too much drama. I don't know an easy solution to your problem, unless there is some way for your wife to tell others it's ok, w/o it being too awkward for her.
I'm not saying you're in an impossible situation, just an interesting one. Good luck!