[two4youinswva]

I see a few people disagreeing with Numbskulls, but I'm not sure what exactly you all are disagreeing with (With the exception of Dynamar, who makes a valid point from her perspective and experiences. No argument there).

I would like to summarize what Numbskulls posted, and maybe that will help me see what the disagreement is over.

1. The sad truth of this lifestyle is that most single guys are NEVER going to connect with anyone in it.
- I have to agree with this. Many will try, only a few will succeed. It takes a special man to be successful in swinging. Think about how many single guy ads you see online. How many do you think are successful? We know a guy that was a regular at a couples only club for quite a while. When he and his lady friend went their separate ways, he has obviously struggled to stay in
the swinging community as a single male.

2. So in that sense, it's not "you"that's the problem, it's the bullshit that some clubs and swinger websites spread about "real swinging wives!" who "swing with single males!" that's to blame. They're only out to get your money.
- Ever see those ads from AFF on some of the sites you visit? "Meet these girls from (insert your city here)". Kyra, Delila, Monique, Portia, blah, blah, blah. All these hot girls wanting to meet you single guy! It's the biggest bunch of BS this side of the Nigerian email scams. Yeah, they want your money.

3. Very few couples and even fewer single women are "looking for single males." The ones that are can be, and are, VERY selective.
- I don't know if it's very few, but I do know it's a smaller portion of the general swinging community. Kind of obvious when you read the threads that sometimes evolve into "Single-Male Smackdown" sessions (which I don't really care for).

4. . If you attend a club or join a website that permits single males, it's not because the couples want you there, it's because the management wants you there. That is because....They're only out to get your money.
- Lots of clubs that allow single males do charge a larger entry fee. You can debate the reasons, but, fact is, they pay more.

5. Occasionally a single guy does connect with a couple. But if you are not young, fit, attractive, and/or reasonably intelligent, your chances of that happening are almost non-existent.
- I know it's not warm and fuzzy, but once again, it does take the special man to make the connection (For examples, see posts by Thrax, Curious Again, Eternally Single).

6. The fact is that most husbands who swing as part of a couple (myself included) wouldn't be successful as single males if we had to proceed in this alone.
- Same here. I feel fairly confident that I would be on the outside looking in.

7. After reading your post and your SLS profile, I would (respectfully) suggest that you are not one of those select few guys who's going to be successful at this as a single male.
- Maybe. Maybe not. But the odds would suggest that Numbskulls is right.

8. But you might be, as part of a couple. Therefore, my advice to you would be......find a woman
- No doubt it would be easier. See my previous statement about the guy that was in, but now is out.

Overall, I'd have to agree with the general sentiments with the post. It may have been raw and very direct, which might be where some of the disagreement stems from, but, I can't really disagree with the post as a whole


So, where did I go wrong in my assessment of Numbskulls' post?