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Originally Posted by cplnuswing  Hi to one of my favorite posters  |
Thank you. I feel the same about you.
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What are the issues (if any) that as an adult really get under your skin and just so go against your core nature that even when it doesn't directly affect you or you know it's not in your best interest to address them, you can't resist trying to do something about it whenever you encounter them?
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Seeing people try to take advantage of others, try to get what they want through intimidating others, or treating others disrespectfully.
I tend to want to step in and do something. These are moments I'm filled with emotion and I have to focus very hard to keep my emotion restrained and to think first rather than react without thought.
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As a follow-up, throughout your life were the changes in how you respond to these things a gradual continuum or was there more of a watershed moment when you decided you weren't going to let things slide anymore?
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I'd say gradual, because I learned early on that many people don't want someone to intervene for them. They can take offense to that. I don't blame them, because how they may handle things could be fine with them and the situation may not be rilling them as it does me.
I am always astounded at how much abuse people will take from others. And when I see this I am more irritated at those who continue to take it than those who are the abusers. It is a two way street. If you allow abuse to happen to you, people will continue to take advantage of you and treat you poorly.
Looking at this issue from another angle, I think finding
myself at a moment in time when I decided to handle my life differently and take charge was an amazingly powerful experience. That was a watershed moment.
One night, while in college, I was sitting on a bed naked with a man in the dark, about to have sex for the first time (because I thought it was time I caught up to what everyone else was doing at my age). To my surprise I felt overcome by something from inside me - like a hidden part of myself just waiting to get out. This "self" told me that I didn't want to be there, I didn't have to be there, and I didn't have to have sex with this man. The best part is that I felt no shame or embarrassment in my decision to leave.
As I walked out to my car I felt I had just exploded through a self-imposed wall and set myself free.
LM