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Originally Posted by 50sLady  I hope I have not given the impression that herpes means the end of my life. It is a skin virus which has no cure at this time. I do plan to enjoy the rest of my life. I am looking forward to weddings and grandchildren. No one in my vanilla life knows what happened to me. I have no visible signs that others can see.
Herpes does mean the end of our swinging life. For that we are very sad. Yes, there are couples who advertise that they have the virus. In order for us to find H swinging partners, we would have to advertise too. There is such a stigma attached to the virus, that I just do not think I can do that now. It just seems so public. The thought of meeting couples and telling them face to face is even scarier. I do not need to fuck other people enough to subject myself to their rejection as they back away from us as if we would give them the virus just by looking at them.
I do want to remind everyone that when you get tested for STDs to show your playmates, should they even ask, you must ask for the HerpesSelect blood test. Normally doctors only test for the STDs that they consider a health risk. Doctors do NOT consider herpes a health risk unless you are pregnant. There is suppressive medicine available, which helps to reduce the outbreaks and also hopefully the pain of any outbreaks that do happen. The doctor will prescribe Valtrex and send you on your way.
Good luck to all of you in remaining STD free.
Please remember that most people who have herpes do not know it. |
I know that it is not the end of life. But anyone who knowingly hides having it, potentially spreading it to unsuspecting victims.... well I have severe issues with that. And yes, I know it has to be asked for specifically, we get tested after 6weeks and 6 months of being with another person. We obviously don't play often. And I also know, that taking Valtrex only lessens the chance of spreading it. That is the problem, it only lessens that chance. And most people don't know it, but anyone who has any form of unprotected sex(vanilla or not) should still be tested for everything very often. That is an issue. People don't seem to think about it. How many of us would forgo our bi-annual dentist appointments? Very few who wanted to keep a healthy mouth. This is just as important. In fact moreso! You can't exactly spread gengivitas to a playmate, but it seems more people are concerned about it, then a life-long skin rash. Just a skin rash, that it may be, but I don't have it--- even though the statistic is 1 out of every 5 adults. Yeah, I research this sort of thing often because I care about keeping my body free of this sort of thing. Trading full test results is absolutely mandatory for any sort of unprotected fun, and if they have played since the test, it's completely protected or not at all. Doctors may not consider it a health risk, but if a person gives me something, knowing I am clean, even if it is just a rash--it is still at this time, lifelong! It's a life sentence, and you know, I would be willing to spend time in prison to be sure somebody else wasn't infected by a pos(s) like herpescpl.
That is sop disgusting.
You, 50'slady, are obviously a strong person, and like was mentioned before, there are groups on yahoo and Adultfriendfinder for people with herpes and other stds. Your swinging doesn't have to end, and neither does your honesty. Nor do you have to make it completely public.