Sounds like we share a story...
My wife and I are 24, we started swinging in September of last year. We took it very slowly to begin with, but as she started liking it more and more we got more and more involved in the life style.
Rarely in the past months has there been a weekend where we didn't go out and meet with other like minded folks. I really agree with your statement
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Swingers do see the world differently, and we still like the view.
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My wife and I do as well.
We still aren't sure how we are going to fully handle the situation. We've already got it, there is no taking it back... it's a life time deal. I'm 24 years old, been healthy all my life and now I get to take a giant blue horse pill every day for the rest of my life. That's a long god-damn time.
I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm upset, and I know my wife is the same way. We took the precautions we thought necessary, we didn't pick people up at the bars, we played with people who we felt comfortable with and who we thought were also safe and sane. We certainly didn't play with anyone exhibiting symptoms, and condoms were always used for intercourse.
Now we have these horrible calls to make to everyone we've been intimate with in the last month. "Hello, some shithead gave us herpes, hopefully A) your not the shithead and B) we didn't give it to you" and hope that everyone in our new found group of friends doesn't hate us and egg our house.
We briefly entertained the idea of not telling anyone, taking our daily valtrex and always requiring a condom... but we just can't do that, yes it would make life easier but god I would feel like such a jackass if anyone of my friends were to become infected from me.
We just saw the doctor this morning so I can't say for sure how all my emotions are going to play out... it's a roller-coaster that's for sure.
The Doc didn't seem to think it matters that much, said 75% of the world has it, now you are just part of that 75%. I know he was trying to make me feel better... and possibly if I wasn't a swinger that would work. But being a swinger, and being as involved in the local community as we have been this puts a serious damper on how we conduct ourselves, and how people are going to react to us even being at the gettogethers. We're extremely concerned with being shunned, and I can't say that we don't deserve it I guess.... but what we definitely don't deserve is people finding out and thinking "those stupid kids" we're not stupid, we're taking the same risks as everyone else in the community.
We are waiting 2 weeks to find out from the swab test if this is HSV1 or HSV2, but I don't even know if that makes a difference really...
Thanks for posting... it's good to know there are other swingers out there that are going through the same shit we are.