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Originally Posted by JustAskJulie  What is it EXACTLY that you are looking for within the lifestyle? What are you hoping to find/ accomplish? Your post confuses me in that regard because on one hand it seems like you want people you can have repeat fun with (I'm not sure if you are wanting friendship or just FBs with a couple) but then on the other hand you mention that you hate the idea of "courting" when you are just there for sex. You can't have it both ways. Either you just want sex or you want more. If you just want sex, then it really shouldn't matter if it happens again. |
When I said "courting" and "acting like we are dating", maybe I should have clarified. We aren't in to sitting around four hours drinking beers and yakking and dancing endlessly. We aren't in to acting like we are in 10th grade and have just seen a real pair of tits for the first time. We like conversing with people first and we like to know if we personally and physically find them attractive. We don't require much time to figure out if we are interested but accept that most other people we find ourselves with don't move as fast.
Honestly, I'd rather masturbate then have bad swinger sex. That said, when we hit it off "well" with someone else sexually, we want to repeat it with them because we know it was good. We do want sex, primarily, but aren't interested in just doing one-timers with different people (any more than necessary) because, well, that's just no fun to us.
And you're probably right. We are probably expecting too much out of the lifestyle.