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gatorvol64 · 02-10-2008, 08:56 PM

Like most of the others, I feel you should find out why your wife wants you to have a girlfriend...not just a f*** buddy if you will. Has she always thought along these lines? Even before you? Does she think she'll eventually want a boyfriend (or girlfriend) herself? Are you as prepared for that as she seems to be with you having a girlfriend?

I can only imagine the difficulty of a married man finding such a relationship. We haven't faced that. We both fell for another couple.

I can tell you that a poly relationship (which is what you are basically talking about if emotions are involved) isn't always an easy road to travel. It can have great rewards, true, but it isn't for everyone.

My advice is to talk a lot more. Ask the questions I and the others have posed to you. When you are in a poly relationship communicating is essential...just as it is in a monagomous one. But, there are times I still will start a conversation telling any of the other three that I want "no bullshit answers". We aren't in the habit of lying to one another but this signals how very important this is for me to talk about. Calmly have a one of these with your wife.

Good Luck!

Vol

02-10-2008, 08:56 PM	#7 (permalink)
gatorvol64 Registered User Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,342 Location: Florida Status: Married Couple & half of a quad Blog Entries: 11	Re: What my wife wants... Like most of the others, I feel you should find out why your wife wants you to have a girlfriend...not just a f*** buddy if you will. Has she always thought along these lines? Even before you? Does she think she'll eventually want a boyfriend (or girlfriend) herself? Are you as prepared for that as she seems to be with you having a girlfriend? I can only imagine the difficulty of a married man finding such a relationship. We haven't faced that. We both fell for another couple. I can tell you that a poly relationship (which is what you are basically talking about if emotions are involved) isn't always an easy road to travel. It can have great rewards, true, but it isn't for everyone. My advice is to talk a lot more. Ask the questions I and the others have posed to you. When you are in a poly relationship communicating is essential...just as it is in a monagomous one. But, there are times I still will start a conversation telling any of the other three that I want "no bullshit answers". We aren't in the habit of lying to one another but this signals how very important this is for me to talk about. Calmly have a one of these with your wife. Good Luck! Vol __________________ He is the Gator and she is the Vol.