Quote:
Originally Posted by socolais  The vibes I get from other folks leads me to believe as long as we're upfront with our preferences and remain reasonably calm with the events (don't freak out), any friendship that develops is based on who we are and not what we'll do in bed. Some folks just want to have a good time and when the sex happens, that's cool too. |
I feel like our new friendships with the owner and their friends is what your reply is all about. They make me feel like what I'm going through is okay. They're all levels of swingers so it's nice to have such a mixture of personalities around me. I feel lucky to have been so welcomed by them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by good times So to answer your question, while we don't hold it against anyone personally and have even made some good friends with these people that are non-swingers, I have to admit that, yes, it is becoming very discouraging to us. Even to the point that we will meet someone and while smiling on the outside, be thinking, "oh no, not another one" on the inside. |
uh-huh...just as I suspected. Thanks for confirming that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by good times The fact is, that due to this problem the local swingers clubs do not have very many actual swingers that attend any more. |
Wow! I can understand your frustration. I don't want to be labled as the couple who goes to the swingers clubs but won't swing. I don't mind being labled the
picky swinger though. I don't fully understand why I get all guarded once I feel pressure. I guess in life I'm like that too. I have my own comfort timetable, which might not sit well with some. I guess I just have to expect it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tia Vampire We started out this way too. You guys have only been in the life-style for three months, so you guys are probably still looking for a couple that you are both attracted to and feel comfortable with. Give your selves time and don't sweat not being very active right now. Believe me, in another three months or so after your in the life- style a little longer and find out the do's and dont's, you guys will feel more comfortable and become more open to others.  |
Thanks so much for saying that. I understand it takes time for some people. I don't think we'll be nonswingers forever but no one's been able to get my juices flowing enough for me to throw caution to the wind. Although I have to say I've come closer than usual with one particular guy, who also happens to be in the circle of friends we hang with. He's never made a move but I know there's some interest on his end too.
Time will tell.
