[incognito]

I'm a fairly regular poster, but am using a different account, because I know other people we've played with are on the board, and I don't want to hurt any feelings. I've been wanting to post this for some time, but wanted to get my thoughts together.

I (the male part of the couple) am ready to throw in the swinging towel, for a couple of reasons. Like many men, the combination of nerves and condoms seem to get the best of me. I can usually get it up, get the condom on, and go at it, but after a few minutes, I've totally deflated. That's only part of the equation. My wife is extremely orgasmic. All of the women I've been with are basically non-orgasmic, by their own admission. There have been a couple of times where the woman apparently orgasmed, but I'm not sure whether it was real or fake. Going from being with a woman who is easy to please to women who are essentially--from the male's standpoint--unpleasable is brutal. Most of the men we've been with have had some performance problems as well. When things go south for them, they'll redirect attention to my wife in other ways until he gets going again, which almost always works. He knows that what he's doing is working and being enjoyed, which helps things along a lot. When I do the same thing, it feels like we're just trying to "get through" something. I could be down there for hours, and it seems like I may as well be brushing her hair. Needless to say, this doesn't help the situation.

I absolutely love to see my wife being pleasured. To see and hear her in bliss is fantastic. But when she and her partner are having the time of their life, and I'm (seemingly) trying to get both of us going with no luck, it's infinitely frustrating which, again, doesn't help the situation. I'm not totally blaming the woman, because my erection is a huge (actually average) part of the equation. Pretty much all of the women have been understanding and say that it's no problem, etc. It's just interesting that somehow, the men that are with my wife seem to get past the problem and make things work. She says it's not me, I'm an excellent lover, etc., etc., and when I'm with her, I feel like the biggest stud in the world. But being with a basically non-responsive woman EVERY time, is killing me. The first few times I chalked it up to being a newby, but I'm at the point where I'm pretty sure I just don't have any game. I mean, every situation we've been in has one common denominator--me. If it sounds like I'm whining, I probably am. I'm just venting more than anything. It would be nice, however, just ONCE to be with a woman who isn't a self-proclaimed non-orgasmic, and see how things go. Do I have the only orgasmic woman on the planet?

Enough ranting. Here's my towel coach.