[SuAndBud]

To get back on-topic and try to answer some of the questions you said you wanted answered, rather than simply respond and offer comments &/or opinions regarding your situation:

What you can expect if/when you’re outed will very much depend upon who/what you are and who/what is the person that decided to throw anything at you at all.

Much negativity and narrow-mindedness and non-acceptance by some (you may even lose some friends – some valued, some not so). Many of these will be being genuine to themselves, but some may be closet-curious themselves or even downright intrigued, but afraid to admit it.

We all change throughout our lives in our opinions (especially with regard to sex) else no-one would ever break a marriage vow of fidelity – if said with sincerity.

Most non-gay males will go through at least a part of their puberty as homophobic (some maintain this attitude beyond puberty and some will subscribe to it unto the grave). A large number, however, will become tolerant of gays as they mature (particularly as they get to meet more gay males and females and share friendships with gay and non-gay folk alike). In some guys this Live-&-Let-Live attitude can morph into a Never-Say-Never philosophy that in turn can become curiosity and culminate in an actual unspoken desire to “Try-Before-You-Die” mentality. – Story of my (Bud’s) life. LOL.

The same can be said of “Swingers”. As we age, we go from disbelief (even disgust) to giggling to tolerance to nonchalance to curiosity to intrigue to “How on earth can I bring THIS subject up with my SO?”.

It depends who they are and at what stage of whatever cycle they happen to be on.

The worst case we know of, though, is a couple who were outed and ended up moving area (they lived in a pretty rough area where “Men are men and women are grateful” – you get the gist?). The poor chap involved had to put up with a daily barrage of men remarking that he was not man enough to satisfy his wife on his own and was often subjected to men saying stuff like “Can I bang your wife?...Why not?...Everyone else does…..What’s wrong with my dick, not good enough for her?”

Wholly intolerable, I think you’ll agree.

Any wonder we need tread careful?