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Originally Posted by couple4fun2821 OK here is the situation, We have a couple that we met once and played with once. SO been with twice. We really really liked them. We all have so much in common, it’s the first couple we have found that we have any desire to actually hang out with in a vanilla setting….. What I mean is we actually think of them as real friends. We all four get along great. We recently went on a weekend outing with them and attended a social on one of the nights. The whole weekend was pretty good. The thing is, is that the male from the other couple wants a FULL swap. I mean he wants to be my wife’s husband for the weekend. He wants to sleep in the bed with her, cuddle, kiss, dance, buy food for, everything. I really don’t mind all that too much. I mean I would like to at least actually sleep with my own wife (which I did. I made that clear) but his wife doesn’t seem to want the same, or she doesn’t receive the same. What I mean is that she doesn’t seem to want to me to do the same to her.. which again I really don’t care but it just seems odd. Also at the social we went to, they didn’t really want us talking to other people. They seemed to get annoyed if my wife mingled as she so often does. It was just kinda awkward at times. It seemed to us that they were the monogamous swinging couple that wanted to changes partners for the weekend. Has anyone ever some across anything like this? Oh and also, they told us about a couple they “met” at the social the weekend before who just happened to show up this weekend. They said the other couple was fun and that they only talked to them and didn’t play. We found out later they did play with them. Like I said My wife and I could care less if they did or not, it was just strange that they would out right lie about it. |
From what you wrote in your original post, I'm a little suspicious of the guy half of this couple. He wants to sort of pull your wife to him for the weekend, but his wife doesn't want the same thing with you. Then, they want you to be "dedicated" to them during social occasions with other people. Is it more the husband who doesn't want you talking to others, or is it both of them? In either case, that combined with the dishonesty is enough to make me wonder whether the guy has control issues, in other words whether he wants to gather you both in and control what you do to make himself feel big.
Another thing to consider is... do you know they were dishonest about playing with that other couple? People do say a lot of things in this lifestyle. Sometimes it is like high school, with some people saying "Oh, we messed around with them", and the target of that comment snorting and saying, "As if". I do think that if they're not honest about who they've been with, that could indicate they will lie about other things.
About "sleep-swapping" as a close friend calls it-- Mr. Fuse and I happily do that with couples with whom we have ongoing relationships. Some couples do, some don't, and we're fine with it either way. We both love it. It does encourage bonding though, so it's something you should decide between yourselves. Like a lot of things in this lifestyle, if it makes you insecure, don't even consider it even if you think you might like it. If you have no urge to do it, then the question is moot.
We don't switch for the weekend, because there's no reason to cleave onto a play partner for that long without being with your own SO in normal ways as well. Why stay away from each other? I love the dynamic of going back and forth, with everyone being comfortable. If a man wants to keep your wife away from you for some structured length of time, I would look askance at that level of possessiveness.