The Swingers Board - View Single Post - Performance anxiety and vacation...advice?

A&M2007 · 06-18-2007, 12:52 PM

Hello all...we're new to the boards and would like to see what some of y'all think....

We are a younger couple, in our late 20's and have been in the lifestyle on and off for about 3 years now. We've never done a full-swap, mostly just soft swap and me (the wife) and the other wifey have done most of the playing while the hubbys watched. We have really became very good friends with this couple. This is one of the very first couples we met when we first began and we've remained very close and go out with them a lot. We have talked many times about doing full-swap with them, and have came very close, but the last few times we've gotten to that point, things have become a little "weird."

My husband is a great lover...very into pleasing me and has always put my pleasure before his own. The last few times we've played w/this couple, things started to get very "hot" and full-swap seemed to be approaching. My husband is very much into the other wife and the other hubby has been wanting a full-swap w/me for some time now. Since we've never done it before, I think my hubby just gets Perfomance anxiety and starts to lose his erection. Even when he's still just playing with me, I think when he starts thinking a full-swap is near, he starts to get very nervous and loses it. I'll try and try to "bring it back to life", but to no avail. I don't get upset, but he does and get frustrated b/c the other hubby is going "full force".

We've always managed to get things to look like they are "okay" to the other couple and he usually will go and get some water and in 30 minutes or so, he's back and we usually go at it w/no problems. So, I just really think it's just his nerves and the fact we've never done it before.

Here's the thing, we are going to a resort w/this other couple in a couple of months and my hubby is nervous and wants to "perform" well. He's thought about Viagra and I know that usually, we all have a lot to drink when we're all together, so that probably has played a role in some way. How would you guys handle this situation? I am sure this has happened to many couples at some time or another and hubby just dosen't understand why since he usually NEVER has a problem w/this at home and we can go 3 times a night usually w/no problems. I just don't want him worrying the whole time we're on vacation and frustrating himself. I want him to enjoy our time there and whatever happens, happens!

Should he look into trying Viagra? Is this stuff safe and is it even worth the money? Thanks to everyone in advance!!

06-18-2007, 12:52 PM	#1 (permalink)
A&M2007 Registered Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 3 Location: Texas Status: Couple	Performance anxiety and vacation...advice? Hello all...we're new to the boards and would like to see what some of y'all think.... We are a younger couple, in our late 20's and have been in the lifestyle on and off for about 3 years now. We've never done a full-swap, mostly just soft swap and me (the wife) and the other wifey have done most of the playing while the hubbys watched. We have really became very good friends with this couple. This is one of the very first couples we met when we first began and we've remained very close and go out with them a lot. We have talked many times about doing full-swap with them, and have came very close, but the last few times we've gotten to that point, things have become a little "weird." My husband is a great lover...very into pleasing me and has always put my pleasure before his own. The last few times we've played w/this couple, things started to get very "hot" and full-swap seemed to be approaching. My husband is very much into the other wife and the other hubby has been wanting a full-swap w/me for some time now. Since we've never done it before, I think my hubby just gets Perfomance anxiety and starts to lose his erection. Even when he's still just playing with me, I think when he starts thinking a full-swap is near, he starts to get very nervous and loses it. I'll try and try to "bring it back to life", but to no avail. I don't get upset, but he does and get frustrated b/c the other hubby is going "full force". We've always managed to get things to look like they are "okay" to the other couple and he usually will go and get some water and in 30 minutes or so, he's back and we usually go at it w/no problems. So, I just really think it's just his nerves and the fact we've never done it before. Here's the thing, we are going to a resort w/this other couple in a couple of months and my hubby is nervous and wants to "perform" well. He's thought about Viagra and I know that usually, we all have a lot to drink when we're all together, so that probably has played a role in some way. How would you guys handle this situation? I am sure this has happened to many couples at some time or another and hubby just dosen't understand why since he usually NEVER has a problem w/this at home and we can go 3 times a night usually w/no problems. I just don't want him worrying the whole time we're on vacation and frustrating himself. I want him to enjoy our time there and whatever happens, happens! Should he look into trying Viagra? Is this stuff safe and is it even worth the money? Thanks to everyone in advance!!