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havefuninsun · 04-03-2007, 01:35 PM

Daisygirl,

I know why your husband told his friend ... this is very exciting stuff! Especially in the beginning. I remember wanting to talk to my vanilla girlfriends about it, then feared they'd tie me up and lock me in a closet until I "came to my senses." So I resisted. As time has passed, I feel the need to share less and less. So my guess is that your husband was probably in the "newlywed" stage when he shared this exiting information with his friend.

Now, just because he let his mom in on the secret doesn't mean he knows who among the group were swingers, if any of them were, right? So unless HE knew who in the crowd played on which side of the tracks, he couldn't have pointed and said, "see that blonde over there? Yep, her. She's one of their playmates."

I'm also going to go out on a limb and say that this guy doesn't have NEARLY the same sort of relationship with his wife as you and your husband have, and how anyone on this board has with their mates. Once you've gotten to be tight as ticks, it's hard to imagine a life where husband and wife really ... well ... don't even like each other much. And if this woman would actually have the nerve to "tell" her husband who he could and couldn't hang out with ... well, they've got bigger issues. I feel sorry for the guy, actually.

I'm sorry you feel so betrayed and hurt. That sucks. And I think some of the advice above is good ... your husband needs to have a chat with him (NOT a confrontation) and just explain your feelings. If he's been friends all these years, he is probably a reasonable man and cherishes his relationship with your husband.

04-03-2007, 01:35 PM	#10 (permalink)
havefuninsun insert witty banter here Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 1,190 Location: Virginia Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:havefuninsun	Re: Outed... Daisygirl, I know why your husband told his friend ... this is very exciting stuff! Especially in the beginning. I remember wanting to talk to my vanilla girlfriends about it, then feared they'd tie me up and lock me in a closet until I "came to my senses." So I resisted. As time has passed, I feel the need to share less and less. So my guess is that your husband was probably in the "newlywed" stage when he shared this exiting information with his friend. Now, just because he let his mom in on the secret doesn't mean he knows who among the group were swingers, if any of them were, right? So unless HE knew who in the crowd played on which side of the tracks, he couldn't have pointed and said, "see that blonde over there? Yep, her. She's one of their playmates." I'm also going to go out on a limb and say that this guy doesn't have NEARLY the same sort of relationship with his wife as you and your husband have, and how anyone on this board has with their mates. Once you've gotten to be tight as ticks, it's hard to imagine a life where husband and wife really ... well ... don't even like each other much. And if this woman would actually have the nerve to "tell" her husband who he could and couldn't hang out with ... well, they've got bigger issues. I feel sorry for the guy, actually. I'm sorry you feel so betrayed and hurt. That sucks. And I think some of the advice above is good ... your husband needs to have a chat with him (NOT a confrontation) and just explain your feelings. If he's been friends all these years, he is probably a reasonable man and cherishes his relationship with your husband.