The Swingers Board - View Single Post - Bad Experience

interested-05 · 03-13-2007, 03:03 AM

Hi Trixie,
While i agree with everyone that you were more than right to kick him out of your lives, I need to add a couple things here.
1st) if you have any red flags, you shouldnt go there, and the answer is "NO"
2nd) is your husband backing you up on this? Honestly, he should have been helping you get out of there and told the guy where to go. I would hope you both talk to each other and share your fears as welll as your fantasies. He is supposed to be your partner, and your support. If you say no he should be getting between you and the offender.
3rd) If you dont set your ground rules and make them clear to others, this will happen again. Dont be afraid to offend anyone regarding what is right for you. There are plenty of couples to meet and enjoy. There is nothing wrong with becoming exclusive, just be choosy with whom you make such an agreement and why you are making it.
4th) make it clear in your profiles what type of people you are not interested in, and scan for those red flags. Ask couples what they are looking for and what they like to do. If their fantasies or anything else turn you off say thanks but no thanks. If they push, send them packing and try to make the door hit them on the way out. you were way to nice when it comes to an abusive situation

03-13-2007, 03:03 AM	#11 (permalink)
interested-05 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 218 Location: CT Status: couple	Re: Bad Experience-are there nice people out there? Hi Trixie, While i agree with everyone that you were more than right to kick him out of your lives, I need to add a couple things here. 1st) if you have any red flags, you shouldnt go there, and the answer is "NO" 2nd) is your husband backing you up on this? Honestly, he should have been helping you get out of there and told the guy where to go. I would hope you both talk to each other and share your fears as welll as your fantasies. He is supposed to be your partner, and your support. If you say no he should be getting between you and the offender. 3rd) If you dont set your ground rules and make them clear to others, this will happen again. Dont be afraid to offend anyone regarding what is right for you. There are plenty of couples to meet and enjoy. There is nothing wrong with becoming exclusive, just be choosy with whom you make such an agreement and why you are making it. 4th) make it clear in your profiles what type of people you are not interested in, and scan for those red flags. Ask couples what they are looking for and what they like to do. If their fantasies or anything else turn you off say thanks but no thanks. If they push, send them packing and try to make the door hit them on the way out. you were way to nice when it comes to an abusive situation