As one that has been holding and promoting parties for many years I would suggest working hard on the Promotion area of your parties.
You sound like you have a good thing going and I have been to NO many times and know the other place you are talking about.
I spoke with friends in NO that have been around the Lifestyle for way to many years and they have never heard of your parties.
You need to get the word out more. Get a real Internet site and even a yahoo group to go with it. NO people are very active in Yahoo but to get the out of town people you need a real site. Many tourists want to see something that makes you look legit.
Also, you do not appear to be listed in the Club Listings here. That is a start, there is a lot of swingers on this web site.
You might always want to join NASCA.
http://www.nasca.com They don't really do much for you but there is a lot of traffic on their web site by people looking for clubs all over the country. That has been a good outlet for us over the years.
Good luck to you!