Hi Bx! We're young too... hubby and I are HS sweethearts (got together at 15, this past October was 10 yrs... married for 5 and a half now) and we have a 1 yr old and a 2 yr old. We're 25... and I have to say that while he was in the active duty military, there was NO freaking WAY we would've ever even considered this Lifestyle. It was just way too much. Being a SAHM/Military wife is one of the toughest jobs I've ever had... and we spent so much time & energy focused on our marriage, the pregnancies, deployments, finances, etc. that while the overall picture was good, our communication (and deep down, our relationship) SUCKED. Big time.
The hubby is no longer active duty, and things for us have gotten much better. I am so in love with this man! We are able to talk to each other about any and everything, and without any kinds of reservations or akward feelings. It is absolutely amazing how we've grown together as a couple. We've had time to adjust to his being home, having the two babies, and living a more civilian-type lifestyle. Active Duty was just way too much for us, and being so young didn't really do much to help.
Anyway, I said all that to say that I totally understand where you're coming from, and I really do think that you should make every effort to talk to your husband about how both of you are feeling and then, as others have said, put swinging aside for now until you've had time to grow and develop a stronger bond & relationship together. I thought I loved my husband before, but spending so much time apart truly did a number on us. At 25, we've gone through more than some of the 35 and 40 yr olds I know, all because of the type of lifestyle the military creates for you.
Swinging is meant to enhance something that's already great. Work on your relationship first, and come back to swinging when the relationship is ready. It may take some time, but it will be well worth it in the end
Good luck & best wishes with whatever you guys decide to do!
~Mrs. Nita