[MoonLightKiss]

I do not know if he suffers from sexual addiction or not, I am neither a doctor nor a therapist so I cannot make that distinction so I am going to cover both bases, and since you say he is going to be reading these posts, I am going to direct the comments to him.

Mr. If you are a sex addict. GET HELP. An addiction to sex is like any other addiction. If you want to destroy your marraige, your wifes love, and the respect of your children, then please feel free to continue. But if you love them, AND love yourself, find a counselor, someone that specializes in sex addiction, and hie yourself off to them ASAP. Beating an addiction is NEVER easy, I can personally attest to that. But it is possible if you want it enough.

If you are just being selfish. STOP. Either you love your wife or you don't. If you do, find a marraige counselor willing to work with you each individually and as a couple. Find the root of the problem as to why you want to have sex with others and work it out. If you don't want to be with her anymore and this is your way of pushing her away cause you want to have sex with others, then for crying out loud just tell her and leave. Don't make up excuses that are going to have her blaming herself. A clean break now hurts, but it hurts much less than unanswered questions with a nasty break.

To the Mrs. If he is an addict, you need to get into counseling as well. Find out why you are enabling him and find ways to stop doing it. This will also help him in his counseling. It probably would not hurt to find out why you were willing to help him continue with his addiction.

If he is selfish and not an addict. Go to counseling anyway. Find out why you were willing to put up with it. This hints of self esteem issues which you probably need to work on. Then find a counselor for you both.

He has a problem. An addiction. Lets say your spouse had an addiction. Drugs, alcohol, whatever. Would you let them go to watch them get worse? Am I only hurting myself and my family for trying to help him when he doesn't want it??????

In answer to this question. Yes, I would. Let me explain why though. I would do it, even though I love my spouse because my first responsibility is to my children. How good of a parent am I, if I constantly enable an addict? My children get to watch me be miserable, stressed out, and watch their father harm himself.

Also, what kind of wife would I be if I enabled his addiction? I would try to get him help. However, if that help was refused, rather than make my entire family miserable, I would remove the problem. If he chose to get help after being put out, I would help him in anyway possible and try to work our marraige out. If our marraige was too far gone to be worked out, then out of love for my children, I would still help him. But if he just flat out refused to fix the problem, no matter how much I loved him, he would be gone til the problem got fixed. Because I ultimately realize that
1. I cannot force him to accept help, no matter how much I want him to.
2. I cannot fix the problem for him.
3. I cannot make excuses for him and enable his addiction and still have a happy home. Everyones misery is not worth his addiction.