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Originally Posted by Pinmonkey Apparently we were taking the plunge into swinging the same way a 5 year old gets in a cold pool in June. First dip the toe until it feels warm. Then another toe.. then another... etc etc. We were just getting comfortable with the idea of having sex with other people, and had a couple of inexperiences when we decided we really really wanted to have a baby. Well due to circumstances this process took ALOT more than we realized it would. Then it happened, she was pregnant and put a lock on everything. About a month ago our little miracle was born. But now she's not happy with the way things are. Her boobs are sagging a little more than before. She has bright red stretch marks on her belly that she's embarrassed about, and the hormones are making her crazy.
Understand, I know that this is all normal, and will eventually go away, and it's still relatively early to even be thinking of this, but is there anything that I can do to help her? Do stretch marks eventually go away? Will she ever be sane again? Will her body go back to "normal"? Will we be able to get a babysitter for the night? (It sounds like the end of an episode of "Soap" doesn't it? lol) |
First off CONGRATULATIONS on your new bundle of joy. These are the times to cherish in your heart because they grow up way too fast. My oldest is 8 and it seems many days, I should still be able to snuggle with him like I did when he was an infant.
As far as the sanity. Yes it will return. Til they turn into teenagers learning to drive.
Then the real fun begins. But in all seriousness there is a balance to be found between being parents and being spouses. And like every new parent you and your wife will have to find yours. The best advice I could give both of you is to enjoy being new parents. Raise your child to the best of your ability, BUT DO NOT lose each other in the process. Sometimes new parents focus so much on the new child they forget to focus on each other. Make that special time with each other. Its not easy, but it is possible. A strong marraige is one of the best examples we can set for our children.
So remember to help your wife. She has alot on her plate too. My hubby always gave me breaks when he could, even if all I had time for was a hot bath. Just knowing I had 20 minutes helped my sanity. And him showing me he still loved me helped even more.
As far as the stretch marks and the physical alterations. Stretch marks usually fade over time, but they do not go away. For some they fade to the point that they are virtually unnoticable. Vitamin E helps some, as does shea and cocoa butter. Remind her regularly that these are not disgusting disfigurements but a sexy reminder of what she did and went through by bringing your child into the world. She should be proud of them, not ashamed.
Again, congratulations on the new addition. I am sure you are a proud papa. My best to you and the new mama.
MLK