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Originally Posted by Darkblue Many couples consider girl/girl play to be a part of soft swing.
4, i dont think this is soft swop after all lets look at it this way, i am not Bi so other than watching i wont play with the other partner would I?so to me this is full swop!! not that i am against this,far from it...  i love the idea.. |
Hi Steve, one of the things that's been bugging you is that you feel your wife has gone
further along in swinging than you have been able to so far. You're chomping at the bit to get to that other woman, and this idea that your wife has gone further is annoying you.
I just wanted to explain more about soft swap. With two women, there's kissing, touching, and oral (all soft) - that's it. If you're soft swapping with the opposite sex, it's the same thing - you'd be kissing, touching, and using your mouth on a woman (and her with you). Right? This is why girl/girl is considered soft play. And like you said, most men love to watch it, so that's what the men get out of it.
So in my mind (for what it's worth), your wife has just been doing soft play so far, just as you have. When you cross over to swapping partners for intercourse, that's when you'll both be all the way there to full swap.
Personally, I think your wife's concerns we've heard are all valid ones. We all worry about STD's at some point, worry if the condom will break, etc. We especially worry if our relationship will change and never be able to go back, or if some damage will be done. We are all different in how quickly or slowly we jump into these things. So, please don't compare your wife to other women who may have said they dove right in. Since you've known your wife for 24 years, you know it's her nature to need to feel thinggs along gradually, it's her way. You love her more than anything, so for her comfort and happiness, you know she needs your patience through this. It's a BIG step for you as a couple, right? And remember, she's never been with another man other than you in her life; that's a big step for a woman. It will happen, because she
wants to go in this direction, but you can't push her. Trust me, the whole experience will be much better for all parties if it only happens when she's ready.
Good luck.