[Tybee Swing]

This is a brilliant question, with brilliant answers so far! I've loved all of these answers posted.

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

I think it's fairly common that people take better care of themselves when they are single and therefore trying to attract potential partners. Too often when we get comfortable in a relationship we take those things for granted... as women we may stop butting so much effort into making sure we have makeup on before we leave the house or for all of us making sure our clothes are just right.

I agree with you, it's mostly common that people get comfortable (lazy) after marriage because the pursuit is off, they got who they're with, they're accepted. It's not a good way to think, and it can be dangerous. We should all be "wooed" and "wooing" on a daily basis, if we want our marriages to stay hot. All of us want to be proud of how our spouse takes care of his or herself, we want to be proud to be on their arm. It may be shallow, but I still want to be physically attracted to him. Yes, I adore him, but I want to be visually turned-on by him, too. I want him to dress well when we're out together, be well-groomed, etc. Sexual attraction, in love or not, is always going to be at least partly based on physical attraction.

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

I think it's fairly common that people take better care of themselves when they are single and therefore trying to attract potential partners.

I'm kind of odd in this department. For some reason, I've always been at my best IN relationships, when I'm really loved. The more loved I feel, the more I want to look good, and the better I take care of myself. I've kept in my best shape when I'm loved and having a great sex life, not when I was lonely and single. Weird, I know! LOL By the time we started discussing swinging in our marriage, I was looking better already than I did when we were still dating.

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

And beyond that, if your partner is one of those that has started making more of an effort to present themselves since you've started pursuing swinging, how does that make you feel? Do you ever feel jealous that they didn't make that effort for you but now they are willing to for others?

If my husband had been a slob, but after starting swinging he finally cleaned up his act, started dressing and grooming better and working out, I'm pretty sure I'd be very peeved that he did it for all of "them", but not for me!