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Originally Posted by lookingfornow You seem irritated that people are giving you "flack" about what you are looking for and willing to do.
If you have posted an ad, are you clear about your rules in your profile? If you are, I can't see why anyone objecting to them would have reason to comment. However, if you are explaining these rules in emails or chats (after someone has contacted you thinking that you each play by the same rules), you are probably going to get push back. I believe your position, while not unique, is certainly not the norm among active swingers. Most want everyone to be playing and having a good time at it.
More experienced couples are going to shy away from your rule set because it calls into question your commitment to what your husband is doing. For example, I, for one, cannot understand why you wouldn't want to play. Of course, that's me. Different strokes. Still, the tone of your email suggests that you are reluctantly willing to let hubby play to satisfy his lust but that you don't really get anything out of playing yourself (at least not with members of the opposite sex).
As to options.
In my experience, couples who enjoy MMF threesomes, don't want the wife to come along to be a vouyer. The F in the threesome wants all of the attention. You may find the odd couple that is willing to let hubby swap fully and you only softly. However, I think you will have better luck finding couples who want to adhere to a ladies anything and couples oral only (both ways) rule.
Put your energy into finding a female who will be a steady third for you. Good luck. They are in high demand. However, if you are both excellent lovers and fun to party with, this would appear to be the option that you find least objectionable. |
LOL I'm not iritated at all, well maybe a little,and only because if you don't agree with whats in my add don't respond,I mean I would'nt read aprofile and then leave amessage that you're on the wrong site because of what you are looking for ,I would move on.Just trying to get a grasp for whats out there and if we are an exception,because it does seem that couples are either full swap or soft swap and we kind of fall in the middle.