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ohash01 · 08-16-2006, 08:18 PM

So the man and I were talking over dinner tonight. I know we had the "why do you say 'friends first'"? debate already...here's a slightly different issue.

We've been chatting with this couple on Yahoo. I like them. Mr. likes them. We are 99.8% sure they like us. Tonight at dinner I said something along the lines of "Yay! They can be our friends!" And Mr. FLIPPED OUT! He was like "woah woah woah...we are NOT using this as a venue to make friends. you could NEVER have a normal relationship with these people. even if you meet a few times first and really connect, the swinging will still be hanging over your head. no. they won't be our friends. why can't you just meet another non-swinging girl on the street who likes shopping and be HER friend".

slight backstory: i do not have many close female friends. i have always been a guys-girl. i worked at a bus garage in college. i probably have 15 super close guy friends and 4 super close girl friends. this annoys mr. he wants me to have normal girl friends that i giggle and go shopping with.

i explained to mr. that this isn't about me meeting lifelong best friends...but i want to LIKE the people we swing with. i don't see a problem with that. i want to be comfortable. i want to know something about them OTHER than that they like sex.

so tell me:
1) is this a weird hope? that i can genuinely LIKE the people we swing with?
2) does anyone have any lifelong friends they've met swinging?
3) do you ever just "hang out" with your swing couples...you know...go see a movie...go get some drinks...go to the zoo?

08-16-2006, 08:18 PM	#1 (permalink)
ohash01 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 535 Location: Ohio Status: Single Female	Friends Debate Revisited So the man and I were talking over dinner tonight. I know we had the "why do you say 'friends first'"? debate already...here's a slightly different issue. We've been chatting with this couple on Yahoo. I like them. Mr. likes them. We are 99.8% sure they like us. Tonight at dinner I said something along the lines of "Yay! They can be our friends!" And Mr. FLIPPED OUT! He was like "woah woah woah...we are NOT using this as a venue to make friends. you could NEVER have a normal relationship with these people. even if you meet a few times first and really connect, the swinging will still be hanging over your head. no. they won't be our friends. why can't you just meet another non-swinging girl on the street who likes shopping and be HER friend". slight backstory: i do not have many close female friends. i have always been a guys-girl. i worked at a bus garage in college. i probably have 15 super close guy friends and 4 super close girl friends. this annoys mr. he wants me to have normal girl friends that i giggle and go shopping with. i explained to mr. that this isn't about me meeting lifelong best friends...but i want to LIKE the people we swing with. i don't see a problem with that. i want to be comfortable. i want to know something about them OTHER than that they like sex. so tell me: 1) is this a weird hope? that i can genuinely LIKE the people we swing with? 2) does anyone have any lifelong friends they've met swinging? 3) do you ever just "hang out" with your swing couples...you know...go see a movie...go get some drinks...go to the zoo?