Hi ohash01, I'm so glad you've got the new plans now. I know you're not meeting this guy after all (at least for now), but just wanted to add some thoughts too, because spotting these things could help in the future.
#1 - Like The Fuse said, don't ever meet people alone without your BF/spouse, not even if this guy said his wife would be or might be there, too. That could be a lie, then you show up, and it's just you and him alone. Don't put that option in
his hands, keep that option out by only showing up with your partner.
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Originally Posted by ohash01 The profile was based mainly around the wife who loves to be with other women while the men watch...(I have never done this, but really really want to!) but the men aren't allowed to participate. |
That could be a legitimate request in a profile. That's what some people are looking for. But, it would be very fishy if the woman herself wasn't doing the pursuing, since this is all about her. If she's very much in the background and he's doing all of the "promoting", she could be an excessively passive (manipulated) person. She could be non-existent, like others said. Either way, you don't want any of that!
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Originally Posted by ohash01 Well - 2 nights ago the husband Yahoo chats me alone. ... The problem is that he now wants to get together with JUST me. Tomorrow. While BF is out of town. |
Did he know that your bf was going out of town? I have a feeling that this was mentioned - and he then jumped on the opportunity. Please don't tell anybody you don't actually
know when your bf is or isn't out of town, just for your own safety.
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Originally Posted by ohash01 He says he kind of "filters" the women for his wife. Shouldn't the wife be doing that? |
Yes, absolutely!! I'm extremely, extremely suspicious of this guy. I think this is the biggest "red light" of all.
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Originally Posted by ohash01 I don't want him to get mad though if I say no. I'm afraid he'll go back and tell his wife that he's not okay with me. His wife is really very beautiful and I'm very interested in having my first F-F experience with her. |
That's exactly how he wanted you to feel. I think he preyed on you because you really wanted this. Can you see how he's in total control here, because you are afraid to make
him mad?
It's important to know that his very beautiful wife may not even exist. Her pictures may have been stolen off of somebody else's profile online somewhere (easy to do). They may have been swiped off of some site, like the ones where people show their amateur pics. They may be some pics that he "collected" from another couple. "Picture collectors" are sleazy men posing as a couple, gaining your trust enough to ask for pics via emails. Now he's got them saved in his computer files to do with as he pleases. Maybe that beautiful woman was a picture collector's "victim". She may even be someone he was in a relationship with once upon a time, like an ex-girlfriend who trusted her bf to take her pics, but now he uses them without her knowledge, against her will. Sadly, this really happens, a lot. I'm sharing all of these possibilities, so that you understand how easy it is for anybody to invent a "beautiful wife" to dangle in front of you, and bait you to meet them.
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Originally Posted by ohash01 This just seems a little fishy to me. What do you think? My gut doesn't feel funky about the couple...just about this one situation. |
It seems more than a
little fishy to me. It reeks like it's been rotting in the sun for 3 days. Not just the one situation (request to meet you alone), but the whole thing.
Big hugs, and be safe.
