One thing I have learned about the lifestyle is communication is essential. And being in the lifestyle forces communication to a level I had never thought possible. Imagine Muffy's surprise when she realized that I really COULDN'T read her mind! My futile attempts to out guess her left both of us confused, frustrated and sometimes hurt. So as we matured in the lifestyle we matured as a couple. It has been an amazing process, much more effective than anything Dr. Phil could have taught us.
So back to the predominant advice that is always given in these forums! Talk. Talk. Talk. At least you are reading the same book. Once you get on the same page, you will be amazed the difference it makes.
Chip