The Swingers Board - View Single Post

Starshine · 07-07-2006, 08:52 PM

Hey,
My hubby and I are new here, but I had to weigh in on this issue.

I am coming at this from a different perspective, I think. I am coming at it as once being a betrayed spouse from my husband's affair.

Anyway, when I read your account, I though, "it screams of affair." I am not saying that I think your wife is having one, but it sure sounds like that is where it was headed(good reason to have no contact with this couple). If this desire to be alone with your wife has come around the same time as this closed door experience you stated, then my bet would be that your wife DID agree to "play" with him. I think people are looking at it as rape, or being violated, but I just do not see how you are being violated if you have 3-4 g-spot orgasims, or are being eaten out. I mean, if I was struggling and trying to get someone I find repulsive off of me(and there have been times I have done this just with my hubby), I do not think I could relax enough to cum...and believe me, I cum pretty d*** easily.

If you all were truly so close, then emotional affairs were already taking place..even if they were between all of you. Add the sex, and you are really asking for trouble. I would say your WIFE betrayed you as much as your "friend" did when she agreed to go behind closed doors...even if she did not mean to have sex. On the other hand, why would she agree to go somewhere alone with him UNLESS she intended for something to happen? Does that make sense??

It would also make sense why you received nasty emails from them. When someone ends an affair, feelings from the other person are very raw and often aggressive. It sounds like your "friends" were hurt and did not understand where you were coming from. It could be that you were the only one out of the loop, so to speak, as to what had been going on.

Maybe I am just overly cautious, since I actually have been on the receiving end of an affair. However, that is why my hubby and I have set strict rules and consider ANY violation of these rules as a betrayal.

I am sorry if I sound harsh, but experience has taught me that if there is anything "fishy" about a story, I should follow my instincts as to what rings true. Good luck in the future.

Starshine

07-07-2006, 08:52 PM	#57 (permalink)
Starshine Registered User Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 1 Location: Illinois	Re: Sexual Blackmail Hey, My hubby and I are new here, but I had to weigh in on this issue. I am coming at this from a different perspective, I think. I am coming at it as once being a betrayed spouse from my husband's affair. Anyway, when I read your account, I though, "it screams of affair." I am not saying that I think your wife is having one, but it sure sounds like that is where it was headed(good reason to have no contact with this couple). If this desire to be alone with your wife has come around the same time as this closed door experience you stated, then my bet would be that your wife DID agree to "play" with him. I think people are looking at it as rape, or being violated, but I just do not see how you are being violated if you have 3-4 g-spot orgasims, or are being eaten out. I mean, if I was struggling and trying to get someone I find repulsive off of me(and there have been times I have done this just with my hubby), I do not think I could relax enough to cum...and believe me, I cum pretty d*** easily. If you all were truly so close, then emotional affairs were already taking place..even if they were between all of you. Add the sex, and you are really asking for trouble. I would say your WIFE betrayed you as much as your "friend" did when she agreed to go behind closed doors...even if she did not mean to have sex. On the other hand, why would she agree to go somewhere alone with him UNLESS she intended for something to happen? Does that make sense?? It would also make sense why you received nasty emails from them. When someone ends an affair, feelings from the other person are very raw and often aggressive. It sounds like your "friends" were hurt and did not understand where you were coming from. It could be that you were the only one out of the loop, so to speak, as to what had been going on. Maybe I am just overly cautious, since I actually have been on the receiving end of an affair. However, that is why my hubby and I have set strict rules and consider ANY violation of these rules as a betrayal. I am sorry if I sound harsh, but experience has taught me that if there is anything "fishy" about a story, I should follow my instincts as to what rings true. Good luck in the future. Starshine