The Swingers Board - View Single Post - Friend trying to talk to her husband about swinging

Tybee Swing · 07-01-2006, 06:33 PM

Blade, don't despair. It's Saturday evening (on the east coast) and many swingers are getting ready to go out for the evening. I'm doing that very same thing, as I sit here with blue clay facial stuff on my face! LOL The board is very slow today, I noticed. I'll bet you will get tons of great answers over the next day or two.

I don't have time for a great, detailed answer myself, but this seems to be at the core of it:

"later he came to her and said "Tell me how our relationship wouldn't change, and how we'd still love each other if we were sleeping with different people?!?"

This is totally understandable, one of the #1 things that people ask themselves and each other before they fully understand swinging and how it works. The bottom line is that sex does not have to equal love, and vice versa. Sex can be separated in the sense that with other people, it is recreational, just for fun, it's what you do with your friends on a Saturday night instead of play Bunco.

I know that's very simplistic, but that's really the way it can and does work for us.

With my hubby and I, love=sex, sex=love, it's all tied up together. But when we play with others, that's just for fun and there's no emotional attachment to it. Like many, we don't swing separately, we keep it together. Not out of jealousy or being insecure, but because doing this together as a couple actually makes us closer emotionally. Closer to each other, not to the other people we happen to be playing with. Not only that, we are far more turned-on by seeing each other swinging, than not.

Hugs,
M.

07-01-2006, 06:33 PM	#3 (permalink)
Tybee Swing Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 1,845 Location: Georgia Status: single female	Re: Friend of a woman who wants her hubby to consider swinging.. Blade, don't despair. It's Saturday evening (on the east coast) and many swingers are getting ready to go out for the evening. I'm doing that very same thing, as I sit here with blue clay facial stuff on my face! LOL The board is very slow today, I noticed. I'll bet you will get tons of great answers over the next day or two. I don't have time for a great, detailed answer myself, but this seems to be at the core of it: "later he came to her and said "Tell me how our relationship wouldn't change, and how we'd still love each other if we were sleeping with different people?!?" This is totally understandable, one of the #1 things that people ask themselves and each other before they fully understand swinging and how it works. The bottom line is that sex does not have to equal love, and vice versa. Sex can be separated in the sense that with other people, it is recreational, just for fun, it's what you do with your friends on a Saturday night instead of play Bunco. I know that's very simplistic, but that's really the way it can and does work for us. With my hubby and I, love=sex, sex=love, it's all tied up together. But when we play with others, that's just for fun and there's no emotional attachment to it. Like many, we don't swing separately, we keep it together. Not out of jealousy or being insecure, but because doing this together as a couple actually makes us closer emotionally. Closer to each other, not to the other people we happen to be playing with. Not only that, we are far more turned-on by seeing each other swinging, than not. Hugs, M.