Have you considered simply trying some mmf threesomes?
Also, in party situation, there wouldn't necessarily be an expectation for you to participate with anyone other than your wife? Is your wife bi? At the very least you could play with exhibitionism similar to what you did in the BDSM lifestyle.
If you wife turns you on and the other women really don't, I'd just wait till you find a woman that really does turn you on. It well could be you just need more foreplay both emotional and physical.
I wouldn't see it as a performance problem-you have something you like-and if some lady wants a piece of that action, she'll have to follow your wife's lead.
Quote:
Originally posted by realharddriver
I’d appreciate any comments regarding my problem; My wife and I have been involved in the swing lifestyle for about 4 months. We’ve met many couples but have only played with 5. I’ve been married for 23 years to my wife and she really turns me on, knows how to turn me on (I require a great deal of stimulation and she is fucking wild…) so here is the general situation. Typically we split off with each others significant other however, I can’t get hard. If I go over to my wife and stick my dick in her mouth (which is basically a threesome) I get a hard erection but as soon as I return to the other woman it goes away. Could it be I’m so habitualized to wife that I just can’t perform with these other women? I’ve never had an affair so there is no experience there. Before this we spent about 5 years in the BDSM lifestyle where sharing ones wife is typically not done and I had no problems then but there was not a great deal of fucking going on either; I was so comfortable in that atmosphere (knowing everyone very well) that getting a hard on and maintaining it was not a problem. Until I can figure something else out I’m not going to put myself in this situation – it’s hard on me and not very pleasant to the other woman involved. Another typical example – last night before our company arrived I had a raging hard on and fucked my wife – my dick stayed hard but as soon as our company arrived it went soft. And never regained it’s abilities until they left at which point I fucked my wife for a solid hour – which is routine for me. Have you heard of other guys with this problem?
Regards,
Earl |