 Re: boundaries, it's a hang-up or they're being jealous?
I'm not trying to bash those who have "rules" I just think that if you as a couple "need" rules to prevent one or the other from doing something that makes the other uncomfortable...that IS different from having rules. My statement was about needing them verses having them.
Now really if you haven't communicated your thoughts feelings and desires with your spouse enough prior to swinging.......you are not going into it fully aware of what may or may not happen. Likewise if you have that kind of communication where is the NEED, do you not trust your spouse to respect your feelings?
That of course is what is preached over and over on the board. Talk, Talk Talk.....and its good advise, Its one of the reasons we were so well adjusted to the lifestyle. I think is would be good for everyone thinking of entertaining the idea of swinging to communicate like this. We spent years talking before our first encounter and when it happened there were no suprises or hang up, we had processed it over and over so many times in our minds that the only suprise is how much fun we really had.
I'll say it again there is nothing wrong with rules or boundaries...everyone has them. That of course is what keeps us civalized. I think that if couples have excessive boundries that they wouldnt be complatiable with a more open minded couple. Is that stupid? |